


Empathic Clues

by Zenece



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-15
Updated: 2013-07-15
Packaged: 2017-12-20 06:54:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/884262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zenece/pseuds/Zenece
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The things an empath picks up on...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Empathic Clues

“Crewman Jurot’s personal log, Stardate 49485.7.” 

Jurot sat down in front of the desktop monitor in the crew quarters she shared with Marie Kaplan. She was glad to be was alone for the evening; her roommate had the late duty shift in Engineering. 

The young woman paused a moment before continuing her log entry.   
“Sometimes it’s... difficult to be the only Betazoid on a Starship, seventy thousand lightyears away from home. I know, I’m technically not the only one, there’s also Lon Suder, but he isn’t like any other Betazoid I’ve ever met... He gives me the creeps, to be honest.”

She sighed deeply. “If only Stadi was still here...” 

Tears still welled up in her eyes when she thought about Voyager’s original pilot. A Betazoid just like her, and the only person here she’d had something of a history with. They’d known each other as kids but had lost track of each other somehow. Yet by some trick of fate, they’d found the other again when both of them were assigned to Voyager. From day one, their friendship had blossomed like never before and their unique bond had deepened with every passing day.   
And then Stadi had died when Voyager was hurtled into the Delta Quadrant. 

Alone in a distant part of space, on a ship full of non-telepathic species the young Betazoid felt a little trapped now and then. No one could hear her thoughts, no one really knew her like she was meant to be known. Part of her yearned to express herself in the unique way of her people: through thought. 

Wiping some stray tears from her cheek, Jurot closed her personal log – unfinished. She’d do it later today. In her current mood she wasn’t going to come up with anything intelligible anyway. 

She headed over to the replicator for some hot Vulcan spice tea, a beverage she had learned to appreciate during her years on Vulcan where she’d gotten her Medical Degree at the Science Academy. 

Jurot sniffled and then chuckled. ‘You’d think that spending a few years with a species so in control of their emotions would’ve rubbed off on me a little.’ She shook her head slowly. ‘Yet the thought of Stadi has me bawling my eyes out...’

As she sat down on the sofa, warming her hands on the cup of tea, she wondered why she wasn’t her usual calm and collected self today. Closing her eyes, she remembered a little incident earlier that day, which had probably thrown her emotionally off course. 

And really, ‘incident’ was too big a word. Nothing more had happened than her bumping into the Captain in the corridor.   
Jurot was coming out of the science lab, looking over her shoulder to wish Samantha Wildman a nice shift, and before she’d even had the time to look, her body had collided with that of the Captain. Jurot lost her balance but managed to grab hold of the door frame with one hand, which prevented her from falling, and reached out with the other to grab the other woman’s arm to keep her steady. 

She’d blushed and had stammered: “I... I... I’m... sorry, Captain. I... didn’t see you. I’m sorry.” 

The Captain had looked a bit dazed but smiled at her.   
“Sorry Crewman, I wasn’t paying attention to where I was walking. Are you alright?” 

Jurot just nodded, bemused by the emotions she’d picked up as the Captain was already on her way again, oblivious to the young woman staring at her back.

To several non-telepathic races including humans, Jurot, like the rest of her species, appeared empathic. She could ‘sense’ their emotions. And although she’d learned to perceive most sensations as ‘background noise’, the more powerful emotions sometimes had quite an impact on her.  
And the emotions she’d picked up from her usually quite stoic and ‘in control’ Captain had been VERY powerful. 

Captain Janeway had not been aware of the intense passion that was radiating from her. And even though it was obvious to Jurot that this passion was not directed at her, the feeling had warmed her to the deepest of her being. Only Stadi ever had that effect on her. This was probably why, she mused, she was missing her Betazoid friend so acutely right now. 

Sipping her tea slowly, Jurot suddenly wondered about something else. These feelings she’d picked up from Captain Janeway, who would’ve elicited them?   
Was the Captain in love with someone? Who could it be?

But her trained analytical mind gained the upper hand. It was illogical to ask questions to which she didn’t have the right to hear the answer. If the Captain was in love, it was none of Jurot’s business.   
Once again, she chuckled at the Vulcan logic that she’d learned to appreciate at times. 

As she glanced at the clock, she stood up and changed in a more comfortable outfit to meet up with some of her friends on the Holodeck. She could use some playful distraction. On her way out she swiftly trailed her fingers over the holo-image of Stadi that was next to her bed. 

~ * ~

“Okay, what do we have here?” 

Lieutenant Torres breezed into the Science Lab and headed straight for the rock sample that had been transported aboard to be analyzed. 

Jurot smiled. She liked the half-Klingon engineer, who carried her heart on her sleeve. Even if her volatile temper sometimes made it a challenge to work with her.   
But right now Torres was all business, her mood firmly in check. Jurot moved to stand next to her and manipulated her console to show her superior the test results. 

“This could be our lucky day Lieutenant. The sample contains fairly high percentages of both polysillicate verterium and monocrystal cortenum. With the amounts available in this planet’s rock formations we could synthesize all the verterium cortenide we need to give the nacelles a very decent overhaul.” 

Jurot picked up a PADD and handed it to Torres.   
“I’ve completed the calculations and added specifications for mining the materials in my report for the Captain.” 

But instead of accepting the PADD, the engineer took a step back and Jurot picked up on a wave of reluctance and unease coming from the Klingon. 

Torres carefully tried to mask it as she spoke.   
“Good work Crewman. Why don’t you report your findings to the Captain yourself? I need to oversee the preparations for the mining procedure.” 

Before Jurot could reply, the Lieutenant had already made her way out of the Science Lab, leaving the young woman with nothing else to do than deliver her report to the Captain personally. 

In the turbolift, on her way to the Bridge, Jurot figured how unusual it was for a mere Crewman to report directly to the Captain. The usual procedure entailed that she and her colleagues would submit their reports to Lieutenant Torres, who then reported to the Captain and provided her with a complete overview of the situation.   
It was highly inefficient to have everybody report to the Captain separately.   
But orders were orders.

She pressed the doorchime and soon heard a distracted ‘come in’.   
It took the Captain a few moments to look up as she was engrossed in her work, but when she did a surprised look adorned her face.   
It only took her a fraction of a second to place a name with the face in front of her.

“Crewman Jurot. What can I help you with?” 

Jurot tried to resist the urge to fidget. Although she genuinely liked the Captain, there was something unnerving about having the woman’s full attention.   
She smiled nervously and held up the PADD.   
“Lieutenant Torres sent me to report on the sample we’ve just analyzed.” 

A flash of emotion emanated from the Captain, but it was too brief for Jurot to ascertain its nature. She frowned slightly, but Janeway regained control immediately, unaware that something had slipped for the Betazoid to notice.   
She cast a polite smile at the young woman in front of her.   
“Well then crewman, report.”

“We’ve determined that the rock formations contain more than enough of the minerals we need to synthesize the amount of verterium cortenide we need.” She handed over the PADD to the Captain. “I’ve included some guidelines for the mining procedure, it’s a bit tricky, but not impossible. We’ll need to place transport enhancers to effectively excavate the compounds.” 

She watched as the Captain quickly reviewed the suggestions she’d included on the PADD and then looked up, smiling appreciatively.   
“Good work Crewman. Your team has my authorization to begin the mining procedures.” 

Jurot smiled and nodded. “Thank you Captain. Lieutenant Torres has already begun with the preparations.” 

There it was again, a very brief flash of an undeterminable emotion when she mentioned Torres’ name. Jurot wondered what this was all about. 

“Make sure your team follows those guidelines you set up to the letter.” The Captain continued. “Ask Lieutenant Torres to go over them again. I don’t want any of you taking unnecessary risks.”

“Yes Ma’am.” Jurot nodded curtly. “We’ll start immediately.”   
She headed for the door after Janeway’s ‘dismissed’, her mind already going over the task at hand. 

~ * ~

“Pay attention ensign! This isn’t a sightseeing trip!” Torres snapped impatiently. 

“Sorry Sir.” Ensign Mulcahey quickly grabbed his tricorder and started scanning the immediate surroundings. He relayed his findings as soon as the data appeared on the screen.  
“The air isn’t too toxic. Although those purple swirls of dust floating around are not exactly good for you, if you know what I mean. So my advice: stick to the oxygen mask.” 

“Great.” Jurot muttered. She wasn’t too fond of the mask and its accompanying heavy hood. It made her feel a bit claustrophobic. But she supposed it was better than breathing purple dust. 

“Alright people, let’s get this over with.” Torres urged her team on. 

She scanned the area. “We’ll split up and work from two sites. That’ll speed up the proceedings. Mulcahey and Brooks, you handle the deposits that are about 100 meters west from here. Jurot, you and I will check out those caves. If my readings are correct we should hit the jackpot about 60 meters from the entrance.”

With a nod, Brooks and Mulcahey set off, while Torres and Jurot activated their wrist lights and an extra torch. 

“Careful where you step crewman.” Torres warned as she took point. “The ground is uneven. And these damned masks are not making it any easier either.” 

Jurot picked up on the other woman’s frustration. Her superior seemed to be in a bad mood since Jurot had returned from the Ready Room with the official ‘go-ahead’. 

“Watch your head!” Torres warned just in time and Jurot ducked to avoid the obstacle. 

The passageway seemed to get a little narrower, she mused. Or maybe that was just her imagination. She felt a flare of panic in her gut at the thought of being trapped in this small space and the urge to take off her mask was overwhelming for a fraction of a second. But then her Vulcan training kicked in and she was in control again.   
She took a few calming breaths. 

Torres instinctually noticed the change in her crewmate and turned her head sideways.   
“Everything okay back there?” 

Even though Torres couldn’t see her, she nodded. “Yes Ma’am. I’m just not so fond of narrow corridors.” 

Her voice was normal and Torres concluded that she was indeed okay, if not a bit tense. But who wouldn’t be edgy in a dark, narrow cave on a not very hospitable planet? 

Torres consulted her tricorder again.   
“Shouldn’t be too far now.” 

They rounded a corner and suddenly the narrow passage gave way to an enormous cavern. The walls and ceiling were emitting a greenish light, giving them a great view of the space in front of them. 

Jurot looked around in wonder, all previous discomfort forgotten. “It’s amazing...”   
Again she was tempted to take off her mask, but now only because it impaired her vision. She smiled. “There must be a phosphorescent component in these rocks. It’s so beautiful. I’ve never seen anything like it!” 

Torres consulted her tricorder. “You’re right, phosphorescence. Now, let’s see if we can find our mineral deposits. I’m picking up traces about five meters that way.” 

Jurot followed her in the direction she’d pointed in.  
Torres’ tricorder beeped as they reached the location and Jurot directed her torch to the ground beneath them. Indeed, the rock beneath their feet had a slightly different color than the surrounding formations. 

“There seems to be a bubble of different material here. It’s approximately five hundred cubic meters and contains high concentrations of polysillicate verterium and monocrystal cortenum. This really is the jackpot! The concentrations are much higher than we anticipated.” 

Catching the sudden enthusiasm of her companion Jurot eagerly started to take off her backpack. “Let me get the transport enhancers. We could mine enough to overhaul the whole fleet back home if we want to!” 

Torres grinned under her oxygen mask and untied her own backpack.   
Together, both women efficiently proceeded to set up the equipment. 

When everything was in place, Torres tapped her combadge.  
“Torres to Transporter Room 2.” 

The only reply was static and the Klingon Engineer rolled her eyes in annoyance before scanning the environment with her tricorder.   
“The cave must be blocking our comsignals.” 

“I can go back outside and contact Voyager from there, Lieutenant.” Jurot offered, even though she didn’t really want to crawl through that narrow corridor unless she absolutely had to. 

But Torres was already on her knees next to one of the transport enhancers, adjusting some of its parameters.   
“No need for that, crewman. I think I can modify the enhancers to amplify our comsignal. With any luck we’ve seen the last of that corridor.” 

After she made the necessary adjustments, the Lieutenant tried again.  
“Torres to Transporter Room 2.”

“Go ahead B’Elanna.” Harry Kim’s voice came through, albeit still a little bit garbled. 

Torres grinned as Jurot silently raised her thumb, sensing the engineer’s pride in solving this little technical glitch. Small victories are rewarding too after all.

“Harry, we’re in position at one of the mineral sites. The transport enhancers are in place, but I think you’ll have to make some adjustments to the annular confinement beam to compensate for the interference coming from the cave walls.”

There were some beeping sounds as a console was being manipulated. “I’ve got it. The interference is limiting my transporting range. We’ll have to get smaller amounts with multiple transports.”

“I’ll reposition the enhancers after the first transport. Contact me to coordinate the setup.”   
Torres took a few steps back to stand next to Jurot. “Begin transport.”

Monitoring the proceedings on her tricorder, Torres absently picked up the familiar hum of a transport in progress.   
A fraction of a second before the little device in her hand registered it; she could hear that something was wrong. The hum gradually changed into a high pitched whine, getting louder and more persistent until a massive explosion ensued. 

~ * ~

Jurot’s mind only registered one thing at first: pain.   
But then, as she regained consciousness completely and instinctively stretched her limbs, it became obvious that she was still in one piece.   
The feeling of pain came from somewhere else. 

She opened her eyes, but it was still dark. Something seemed to be covering her face.   
Jurot tentatively brought one hand up and felt a thick, heavy, rubbery cloth. Then she became aware of a hiss of fresh air against her right cheek.   
Her oxygen mask.  
Checking the supply as she sat up, the young woman put the mask on properly so that it was in front of her mouth again and she could see through the visor in the hood. 

Then she looked around. And in her confused mind, previous events were puzzled back together.   
The cave, the transport, and then the explosion. 

The cave was still filled with eerie green light coming from the walls; only now thick clouds of dust were tempering it. Jurot couldn’t see very far. 

As she was getting her bearings, another flash of pain shot through the young woman’s body. But this time she was alert enough to recognize that it wasn’t coming from her own body, it was the pain of someone else she was empathically picking up: Torres.

“Lieutenant!” She yelled.

There was no response. 

With great effort, Jurot got on her feet. Her muscles were a bit sore from impact on the hard floor.   
Her hand flew to her combadge. 

“Jurot to Voyager.” 

She only heard static. 

Jurot looked at her surroundings. The explosion had been very powerful by the looks of it. There was a great deal of debris and rubble all over the place.   
In the soft green light, she looked for the shape of a human body. 

“Lieutenant Torres!” She yelled again. But to no avail.

She started going through the debris scattered all around her. Lifting a stone, Jurot saw something metallic still half buried, dimly glistening. She dug it out quickly. It was a transport enhancer, broken in two and utterly useless. So much for contacting Voyager.

Jurot cursed. “Lieutenant!” She yelled again, as loud as she could, and then strained her ears and eyes to pick up every possible sound or the faintest of movements.

If only she could find her torch. The light coming from the walls was strong enough to give a sense of comfort, but totally inadequate to make out anything more than vague shapes. 

She wouldn’t find Torres just by looking around. And unless she wanted turn every stone in this cave, Jurot would have to come up with another way to locate her teammate. 

A little panicky voice started seeping into her conscious mind. It pointed out to her that she was trapped in a cave on a not so very hospitable planet and...

She stopped the voice short, calming herself down the way she had been taught by a wise Vulcan master during her training.   
Jurot took a few deep breaths and felt the sea of her emotions calm down once again as she focused on the comforting sounds of her own breath. 

The SOUNDS of her breath! Of course! If Lieutenant Torres’ oxygen mask was still functional she might be able to HEAR it. She would of course have to shut down her own air supply for a moment but it might work!   
After all, Mulcahey had said the air was only a little toxic. A lungful or two wouldn’t kill her.

The young Betazoid reached back for the controls and switched the air supply off.   
The sudden silence roared in her ears as she held her breath and listened carefully. 

Nothing.

She proceeded to take off her hood, feeling like it was interfering with her hearing. 

Still nothing.

Or... maybe a faint hiss to her left? She turned her head. It could be.   
She took a few steps in the general direction of the sound.  
Her lungs were starting to request air and she momentarily wondered if she’d dare breathe the cave’s atmosphere. Turning on her oxygen supply might cause her to lose track of the hiss. And it would take too much time. 

She remembered an old human adage she’d heard once. ‘What doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger.’ What kind of idiot ever came up with that?   
Jurot inhaled carefully and felt a strange, uncomfortable tickle in her lungs.   
She’d have to hurry. 

After a few more steps, the young woman presumed she’d reached the hiss and stooped over, clearing some of the debris in front of her.   
She’d breathed a few gulps of the air inside the cave and her windpipe was starting to feel like it had been sand scrubbed. She’d need oxygen again soon. 

She was about to give up, when her gloved hand suddenly felt something soft to the touch. Clearing some more of the rubble she grabbed hold of a uniformed arm.   
Momentarily forgetting her own distress, she quickly started to dig out the Lieutenant’s body. 

Jurot lifted the hood a little off Torres’ face; took off her own gloves and felt the limp woman’s neck for a pulse. A surge of relief flooded her senses when she sensed it faint but steady. 

A violent coughing fit caused her to pause and reactivate her own air supply before checking Torres over further. The fresh oxygen soothed her abused lungs a bit, but being a trained field medic, Jurot knew that she’d done some serious damage. 

When she attempted to check how much air she had left, she found that the display had been busted. She couldn’t be sure how much was still in there.   
Maybe Torres’ display would give some indication.   
Jurot tried not to move the Lieutenant too much in case there were spinal injuries as she tried to find the little screen. 

She gasped in horror as she found it. It was angrily flashing a red light, signaling that the carbon dioxide filters were malfunctioning. B’Elanna wasn’t breathing oxygen; she was breathing the carbon dioxide her own body produced, thus slowly poisoning herself. 

Jurot needed to remove the hood, and fast. She prayed that she wasn’t doing any more damage when she moved the Lieutenant’s neck a little to get the rather heavy mask and hood off.   
B’Elanna’s breath was barely perceptible and Jurot quickly performed the necessary actions to improve the other woman’s intake of air. 

After taking a few big gulps of oxygen from her own mask, she quickly took it off and placed it over Torres’ mouth. There wasn’t much else she could do at this point. 

Jurot quickly examined Torres’ body. Outwardly the unconscious woman seemed fine, apart from a few bumps and bruises. But without a tricorder it was impossible to ascertain the extent of any internal injuries.  
She felt the other woman’s pulse again. It seemed a bit stronger than it had been before. Jurot let out a sigh of relief and promptly started coughing.   
This was no good. She needed a few gulps of fresh air.   
Quickly she lifted the mask from Torres’ face and put it over her own mouth, relishing the soothing feeling of clean air in her lungs. 

She’d have to find a way to repair the other oxygen mask, Jurot thought to herself.   
Every breath of the planet’s atmosphere was one too many. She could feel the stinging of her windpipe and lungs become more insistent and tried to resist the urge to cough.   
Coughing would only make it worse. 

Jurot carefully reached over to unstrap the oxygen tank from the still unconscious body of her teammate. Maybe she could somehow fix the device.  
She pried open the compartment of the control mechanism, but without the proper tools and in the dim light it was difficult to see what exactly was wrong with it. 

While she was thinking, Jurot felt the body next to her stir ever so slightly, and her senses flooded with pain briefly before Torres woke up with a long groan.   
Jurot immediately put her hands around the woman’s head to keep her still. 

“Try not to move Lieutenant. You may have injured your spine at impact.” 

Torres blinked furiously with a confused look in her eyes. 

“What happened?” She croaked. 

“There was an explosion when we started transporting the minerals. We can’t contact Voyager unless we find a way out of the caves. And without a tricorder, that won’t be easy.” 

She was interrupted by a coughing fit. 

“I need some air. Can you hold your breath for a few seconds? Try not to inhale this stuff if you can.” She asked her superior. 

“Sure.” Torres slurred. 

Swiftly Jurot put on the mask and took a few deep breaths while the other woman patiently held her breath. 

“The other mask is busted.” Jurot started as she hooked B’Elanna up again. “The carbon filters were malfunctioning. You almost poisoned yourself.” 

Torres spoke slowly. “Is that why my head feels like it is stuffed with cotton balls?” 

Jurot smiled briefly. “Yep. Are you in a lot of pain?” 

The other woman grimaced. “No.” 

“Liar.” Jurot scowled as she gently probed the Lieutenants body. “I think you’re bleeding internally, but without a tricorder I can’t say how bad it is. It would be best if you didn’t move.” 

“I’m not going anywhere.” 

Jurot grinned. “Well, your sense of humor is still intact. You’ll live. Hey, could I get some more of that oxygen?” 

“All yours.” Torres said, dutifully preparing to hold her breath. 

She watched as Jurot hungrily breathed the clean air and waited until the mask was on her own face again before she spoke.

“Can you repair the other one?” 

Jurot shook her head. “Not without new filters.” 

They stayed silent for a moment. 

“These masks contain three filters each, don’t they?” Torres struggled to clear the fog in her head. It made thinking quite a challenge. 

Sensing where the other woman was going, Jurot chipped in. “Take one out of yours and put it in this one?”

“You read my mind.” Torres sounded tired. “According to Starfleet regulations the absolute minimum is two filters. But one has to be better than none.”

Jurot hesitated. It seemed stupid to risk damaging the one good oxygen mask they had. But the burning in her lungs was getting worse with every breath she took. And the Lieutenant needed as much pure air as she could get as well.   
Something had to be done. 

“Alright.” Jurot said in a raspy voice. “Let’s find out if we can remove the malfunctioning filters from their casing without the proper tools.”   
She coughed violently again. “I need some air first.”

~ * ~

“Okay, here goes.” Jurot’s voice was barely audible. It hurt to talk. It hurt to breathe. Her lungs and windpipe felt like they were on fire. If this went wrong then she’d be in serious trouble. 

She switched on the air supply and checked the display. A warning flashed on the screen saying that the system was operating with only one filter pack. Jurot quickly overwrote the safeties and a fraction of a second later she felt a hiss of air against her face. 

Tentatively she took a few breaths, monitoring the readings on the tiny screen. The carbon dioxide levels were high, but still a little below the safety threshold. 

“It worked.” She mumbled, feeling extremely relieved.

The clean air appeased the burning in Jurot’s lungs somewhat and she suddenly felt how exhausted she was. In the back of her mind she could feel Torres’ discomfort and she scooted over to her senior officer, settling next to her. 

“How are you holding up Sir?” She asked the half-Klingon. 

Torres grimaced. “I’m not dead yet, crewman. How’s the breathing coming?”

“A little better now. Although I’m quite sure the Doctor will give me a stern lecture when we’re back on Voyager. After all, I should know better.” 

“Well, since I owe you my life, I’ll disable his speech subroutines for you.” Torres smirked. 

Jurot laughed and immediately exploded into a coughing fit. Tears sprung into her eyes from pure agony.   
When the coughing finally subsided she was shaking all over her body and barely had enough strength to sit up. 

“Are you ok?”   
The feeling of worry in the Lieutenant was strong enough for Jurot to pick up on.

She nodded. “I’d get up and search for a way out or anything that may help us contact Voyager, but I’ll need a few minutes to get my strength back.” Her voice sounded like it had been sand scrubbed. 

“Stay put crewman. There’s no point in running around. In this dim light and without a tricorder you might even get lost. Save your strength and your oxygen supply. They’ll come for us. They know we’re down here and they must know something went wrong. I’m sure help is on the way.” 

Jurot nodded and settled as comfortably as she could on the rocky floor. “You’re right. I told the Captain that there were risks involved. She must have figured out we’re in trouble.”

“Yeah...” Torres whispered, lost in thought. “She’ll come to rescue me.” 

Jurot frowned as she again picked up on the unease Torres displayed when it came to Janeway. She wondered what caused it, especially since the Captain had had strong emotional reactions in the Ready Room, albeit more guarded, when Torres was mentioned as well. Jurot hadn’t been able to read Janeway very well then. But she was sure something was up. 

Both women stayed silent for a while, each of them in deep thought.

~ * ~

A sharp pain shot through Torres’ abdomen and the woman cried out. Jurot, all too aware of the intensity of the pain, jumped up and hovered over the other woman. 

“What was that?” Torres breathed, her eyes wide, trying not to panic.

“It’s difficult to say without a tricorder.” Jurot countered while she softly pressed her colleague’s belly. She mentally went over the possibilities and decided that the sooner Voyager found them the better.   
“Just try to relax. You’ll be fine.” 

“You’re a lousy liar.” Torres rebuked and then grunted heavily as the pain flared up again. 

Jurot took her superior’s hand. “They’ll be here soon. All you have to do is hold on.” 

Squeezing the proffered hand, Torres grunted. “You make it sounds so easy.” There was a note of despair in her voice. “It’s getting worse each time.” 

There wasn’t much Jurot could do. She could feel Torres flirt with unconsciousness each time the pain surged through her body. 

The half-Klingon was breathing heavily by now, her appearance ashen.   
“I don’t want to die like this.” She croaked. 

“Sshh, you won’t.” Jurot soothed. 

“Tell Janeway... that I’m sorry for being... such a... coward.”   
With that, Torres lost her struggle and drifted into unconsciousness.

Jurot searched for her pulse and found it racing. She needed medical attention NOW. 

A few minutes later -but it might just as well have been an eternity- Jurot heard the telltale sounds of people making their way towards them and shouted ‘over here!’ to her shipmates. 

~ * ~

The sound of soft voices woke Jurot out of her slumber but she stayed put and kept her eyes closed. She could hear the Doctor briefing Captain Janeway on the other side of Sickbay.

“They’re both asleep right now. Lieutenant Torres has been very lucky. A few minutes later and even my expertise wouldn’t have been enough. But, as it is, I expect she’ll make a full recovery. And so will Crewman Jurot. Although a brush up in Starfleet safety protocols when it comes to toxic atmospheres might not be lost on her in the future.”

Janeway thanked him and made her way over to the two other occupants of the room. She brushed briefly along Jurot’s biobed, only to come to a stand still next to the still form of her Chief Engineer. 

Jurot risked peeking through her eyelashes. She saw the Captain standing, slightly hunched over Torres, her arms hanging next to her body. No words were spoken. But feelings were out there. Lots of them. And Jurot’s eyes went wide as she realized their meaning.   
Then the Captain sighed deeply and headed out of Sickbay.

Jurot lay contemplating for a moment what she’d just witnessed before stage-whispering to her companion: “You can open your eyes now Lieutenant. She’s gone.” 

Torres sat up, grinning sheepishly. “What gave me away?” 

Jurot tapped her own head and laughed. “Betazoid, Lieutenant. Takes more than that to trick me!” 

“Right, I’ll remember that.” Torres nodded, both eyebrows raised. 

Jurot cocked her head slightly to the side, frowned and bit her lip before speaking. “I thought you regretted being such a coward?” 

Caught by surprise, Torres opened her mouth and then closed it again, her brain kicking into gear. Finally she sighed. “It’s a little complicated Crewman.” 

But Jurot wasn’t that easily brushed off. “Why? She loves you so much! And I happen to know that you have feelings for her as well. Why would you push her away like that? What are you afraid of?” 

“I do NOT have feelings for her!” Torres spat. “We had a good solid friendship and then a few days ago she had to ruin it all by telling me she loves me and KISS me! Well, I don’t feel the same. I don’t love her! That’s just completely ridiculous!” 

Jurot looked at the woman sitting on the other biobed, breathing hard. She looked so angry and confused. And on the inside, she had so many feelings running through her and she couldn’t make heads or tails of any of it.   
The young Betazoid’s voice was soft when she spoke. “Tell Janeway that I’m sorry for being such a coward. Those are the words you said before you lost consciousness on the planet... But I guess you’re right. Doesn’t sound like you care at all.” 

Torres shook her head slowly and swallowed hard. “I’m not in love with her.” She whispered in an uneven voice. “I’m not.” 

“I’m sure you’re right Lieutenant.” Jurot tapped her head again. “After all, what do I know, right?”   
She lay back down on her biobed and closed her eyes. Torres would have to discover her own truth. In the back of her mind, she could hear the other woman questioning herself. Surely she’d find the answers she was looking for now that Jurot had set things in motion.  
Still feeling a bit woozy from recent experiences, the young Betazoid surrendered to a restful sleep. 

~ * ~

Jurot sat cuddled up nice and warm under her favorite blanket on the couch, a book in her lap and a cup of Vulcan spice tea on the side table next to her. Moments earlier, she’d been released from Sickbay along with the friendly warning no to show up there again soon.   
Both she and Lieutenant Torres had been given an extra day off to recuperate at home. 

Her thoughts inadvertently drifted to her superior officer. Why was Torres so afraid of her own feelings? Jurot couldn’t really figure it out. But it wasn’t her business, she reminded herself.

With a small sigh, she took a sip of her tea, got comfortable and leafed back a few pages in her book to get into the story again.   
Half an hour later, the doorbell pulled her back to reality.

Jurot sat up, mildly confused, her mind still partially in a fantasy world. “Come in!” 

The door opened and revealed Lieutenant Torres in off-duty attire.

“Lieutenant! Come in, what can I do for you?” Jurot jumped up from the couch. 

Torres came in and stood in the centre of the room. It didn’t really take a Betazoid to see that she was confused. It was clearly visible in her eyes. They danced restlessly across the room, yet not taking in any of the surroundings. 

Jurot tentatively stepped closer and cocked her head. “Lieutenant?” 

Torres then half snapped out of it and fixed her gaze on the questioning face in front of her. She needed a moment to put the words together, still struggling to grasp their meaning. 

“I AM in love with her.” She whispered after a while, a desperate note clearly present in her voice. 

Jurot pursed her lips. “You don’t seem too happy about that...” 

But Torres had zoned out again, unable to process everything she was feeling. Jurot sensed she needed time and maybe a little help to navigate the storms in her head. She guided her superior officer to the couch and gently urged her to sit down. 

Taking place in front of her, Jurot softly asked the question she’d asked once before. 

“What are you afraid of?” 

Torres looked up and bit her lip. “She was safe, you know? It was safe for her to be my friend.” 

Jurot frowned, only sensing confusion in the other woman. “And it isn’t safe to be more than friends?” 

“No.” 

“Why not?” She inquired gently, trying to give the woman in front of her the time to work it all out by herself.

Torres was staring at her own hands but looked up, her gaze suddenly defensive. “Because she’ll leave. They always do.” 

Jurot blinked in surprise. “Who does?” 

The half Klingon looked away, seemingly fascinated by the stars streaking by through the window. Jurot could feel proverbial walls forming and feared that the woman was retreating into herself again. She decided to push a little.

“Why would Janeway leave you if you tell her that you love her?” 

Torres let out a bitter laugh. “Oh she wouldn’t leave because of that. She’ll leave as soon as she finds out that I’m impossible to live with.” 

She chuckled mirthlessly and got up, pacing around the room. “Because I am impossible to live with you know. People can deal with me as their friend, but not as their lover.”

Coming to a standstill in front of the window, she pressed her ridged forehead against it. “They all run away as fast as they can.” 

“Why?” Jurot asked, sensing that Torres needed some prodding and probing to keep going. “Why are you impossible to live with?” 

Torres threw her arms in the air, giving into the anger she suddenly felt. “Because I just am dammit! I don’t know! Ask them!” 

“I’m asking why YOU think you’re impossible to live with.” Jurot asked in a neutral voice. 

The other woman’s anger disappeared and was replaced with resignation. She turned to face the Betazoid. “Because of all this. No one can live with a half-Klingon. I am not like you, any of you. And friends have the luxury of looking the other way or backing off when they can’t deal with that.”   
Torres closed her eyes before continuing. “But all the people who ever said they loved me... They ran away.” 

“Because you’re too Klingon?”

“Yes.” 

“Hmm.” Jurot countered pensively. “But they’re in love with YOU, and your Klingon side is an integral part of who you are. I can’t really imagine they’d run off because you feel the need to throw vases against the wall during an argument.” 

Torres shrugged. “They put up with it for a while. But eventually they’ve had enough. They can’t accept me for who I am and walk away. Why should Janeway be any different?” 

Jurot hesitated slightly, knowing that what she was going to say next was not what Torres wanted to hear. Yet she needed to.   
“THEY can’t accept who you are? Or YOU can’t?” 

Again, she felt Torres tense up, a sure sign that she was treading on dangerous grounds, but also an indication that she was going in the right direction. 

“I’ve come to terms with my heritage a long time ago.” 

“Yet you’re quick to name it as the root cause of all your problems. Tell me,” Jurot went on, “if you’ve come to terms with being part Klingon, why do you still feel so frustrated when that part of you surfaces?” 

“I am not frustrated when...” Torres started vehemently but abruptly shut up when she saw Jurot tapping her head, indicating her empathic abilities. 

They stayed silent for a moment while a half-Klingon brain struggled to make sense of it all. 

Torres sighed. “So they all leave because I can’t accept myself?” 

Jurot didn’t answer. She knew the penny had dropped. 

“You might have a point there.” Torres answered her own question. “I guess I have a lot of thinking to do.” 

She walked over to where the young Betazoid was standing and gave her an impromptu hug. “Thank you. I guess...” 

Jurot grinned. “Anytime.” 

As Torres made her way to the door, Jurot stopped her.  
“Lieutenant. With the Captain it can be different. That is, if you let it...” 

Torres nodded pensively. “Yeah.” 

~ * ~

Jurot waited for the turbolift after a late night of pool and a bit of syntehol at Sandrine’s. Hopefully she’d be able to sleep now. There was such a thing as too much rest, she’d discovered after spending some time in Sickbay and a day or two resting in her quarters.   
Her body was desperate for a good workout on the Holodeck, but the Doctor had warned her to take it easy for a while. 

The turbolift arrived and Jurot stepped in, smiling politely at its sole occupant and stated her destination.

“Good evening Captain.”

Janeway nodded in return. “Crewman.” 

She looked tired, Jurot noticed, but her command mask was firmly in place.   
What would she be like underneath it, Jurot couldn’t help but wonder. It was difficult to rhyme; this stoic woman on one side and the one that had opened up to Torres and even kissed her on the other. 

Even with the mask in place some of the Captain’s fiery spirit sometimes escaped. To see her without the constraints of command had to be breathtaking.   
And Janeway and Torres together? What a fire THAT must be, Jurot mused. 

She wondered if Torres had already talked to her, about her love and her fears.   
The way Jurot saw it, Janeway could be the answer to the half-Klingon’s quest in this life.   
‘I’m crossing my fingers for you two.’ She mentally told the Captain as the turbolift stopped and Janeway exited.

~ * ~

“Quarter for your thoughts.”

Torres looked up, startled, as Jurot set her tray of food on the table and sat down in front of her. 

“It’s ‘PENNY for your thoughts’.” She corrected. “And besides, can’t you read them for free?” 

Jurot grinned. “Well, yes, but it’s much more fun this way.”   
She grabbed her spoon and made a face. “Well, here goes. Boy, I just love blue goo.”

Torres smiled as Jurot brought the spoon to her mouth and tentatively tasted it.  
“It’s not as bad as it looks really.” 

“I’ll just take your word for it, thank you.” Torres replied with a skeptic look.

Shrugging, Jurot continued eating. 

“So,” she asked casually after a few moments, “have you talked to her already?” 

Torres looked down at her hands. “She’s been avoiding me lately.” 

Jurot gently placed her hand over Torres’, sensing her insecurities. “That doesn’t mean she’s running away.” 

There was a mixture of defiance, hope and vulnerability in Torres’ eyes as she looked up.   
“How do you know?” 

“Let’s look at this from her perspective. She told you that she loved you weeks ago, didn’t she?”

Torres nodded.

“And you, to put it delicately, didn’t exactly welcome that statement at the time. You in fact did everything you could to avoid HER. Correct?” 

“Well... Yes.”

“So you think maybe she got the idea that you weren’t interested?” Jurot asked. 

“But I AM interested!” Torres almost shouted and then remembered she was in the Mess Hall and lowered her voice. “I am interested. I was just scared back then.” 

Jurot smiled. “All the more reason you should talk to her.”

“I would.” Torres countered. “But she doesn’t seem very inclined to see me.”

“She’s in love with you. Don’t you think she’d like to know that you’re in love with her as well?” Jurot asked. “After all, what is more beautiful than two people loving each other?” She added with a slight theatrical flair. 

Torres gave her a weak smile and Jurot squeezed her hand encouragingly. “I know you’re afraid of the pattern you uncovered in your love life. But it doesn’t have to be like that again. Talk to her. Tell her how you feel: your hopes, your fears. Stop being a coward and just let her in.” 

~ * ~

“I did it. I told her.” Torres entered the science lab with a triumphant smile. 

Jurot looked up expectantly from her console. “And?” 

Torres seemed unable to get the grin off her face. “I’m having dinner at her quarters tonight...”

“Oh you have to give me more than that!” Jurot exclaimed. “How did you say it? What was her response?”

Torres closed her eyes, replaying the events in her mind. “Well, she was a bit surprised to see me when I entered the Ready Room, unsure what to do and how to act...  
‘I have to tell you something.’ I said. ‘Care to join me on the couch?’” 

A smile played around Torres mouth as she remembered. 

“So we sat down on the couch and I took her hands in mine. All the way up to the Ready Room I’d been trying to find the right words, but as I looked into her eyes none of them seemed to do.” 

“I brought her hands up to my lips and placed a soft kiss on them.” Torres acted out the gesture in the air as she spoke. “And I told her that I loved her.” 

Jurot sighed in appreciation.

“She whispered that she loved me too and when I looked up she was looking at me with so much love in her eyes.” Torres’ voice grew silent, still amazed by the events. “No one ever looked at me like that. No one ever touched me so deeply...”

“That’s beautiful.” Jurot, always very touched by love stories, whispered softly.

“’Me and love haven’t always been on the best of terms in the past,’ I told her, ‘mostly because of me. But I’ve learned a lot and I want to be with you more than anything, if you still want to be with me, that is.’” 

The retelling of events was having a strong effect on Torres. Jurot could sense her emotions almost as intensely as if they were her own. 

“A tear ran down her cheek as she said ‘I would like that very much.’ choked up with emotion. We both smiled then and hugged each other tight.” 

“And THEN...” Torres made an annoyed face. “Then we got disturbed by Tuvok!” 

Jurot laughed. “Good timing.” 

“So we made plans to explore this further over dinner tonight.” Torres concluded, grinning nervously, almost unable to temper the elation she felt coursing through her body.

“Bet you can’t wait ‘til then!” Jurot teased.

“Does it show?” Torres asked. “There is so much I want to share with her. So many feelings and thoughts and...” She stopped and blushed, bowing her head to Jurot conspiratorially. “And I want to kiss her again. Because let me tell you: that woman knows how to kiss...” 

“Does she now?” Jurot laughed. 

Torres wiggled her eyebrows. “Oh yes.” 

~ * ~

“You’re late for your shift again!” Jurot chided her mirror image. 

Without breakfast she practically ran out her quarters and headed for the nearest turbolift. That thing was taking its time today.

A few minutes later she rounded the last corner. The doors opened upon her approach and she entered the Science Lab.

A voice that wasn’t supposed to be there startled her. “You’re late Crewman.” 

Jurot whirled around. “I’m sorry Captain. I overslept, it won’t happen again.” 

Janeway grinned. “I’ll let it slide just this once. After all I owe you one it seems.” 

It took Jurot only a moment to figure out what she meant. It was quite obvious anyway. The Captain was positively glowing with happiness.   
She extended a hand.   
“Congratulations Ma’am. I’m really happy for you two.” 

Janeway shook it. “Thank you.” And Jurot sensed clearly how deep her gratitude was. 

The young Betazoid felt pride as she looked at Janeway’s back exiting the lab. She’d helped make this happen. 

Two people were together, in love.


End file.
